MP on Gangs (Brazil blog)

Rio de Janeiro (very belated, and uninteresting to anyone ive had chance to message..or just uninteresting maybe).

Sampled the quintessentially cliched Rio life - samba, guns, and saline..

Went to a samba school, basically a carnaval warm-up, thousands of people samba smashing it in the street. Also bodyboarded (surfing for us gay icons), street partied it, and an all-night rave in a favella/slum. Amazing/worrying how quick i became desensitised to guns. Im no expert on guns (i dont even know the size of my car engine, or how to scramble eggs untill last month), so they were all dancing with 6ft guns like us nobheads dance with wannabe phallic ropelights . We were the only gringoes, and the only ones unarmed. Was only the second time the hostel had been to the rave, and the last. One lad from our hostel exercised the cardinal sin (like a snogging prostitute, apparently) - took a photo. He was set upon with all manner of guns (big ones, err medium ones, scary ones etc), had him down on the floor with them pointed etc. Note - going off my mate Troy's innate wikipedia, these favelas in Rio are amongst the highest in the world for murder rates (unique selling point i guess, worked on me). Threatened to get nasty for all us gringoes (about 7 of us), then a minibus appeared, either to round us up and take us up the hill for a bonding session of torture, or to get us the hell out, we gambled..As we stepped in the minibus tonnes of fireworks were set-off, I didn't see them at first, thought we were being shot at with err scary guns..Later learnt that this means theres people in the favella who aren't welcome, so probably wouldn't of surprised me if my initial hunch was right..

A local had previously capitalised on our drunk/Yesman state to get us to agree to a tour of the favella the next day (we'd previously said no when sober, i hadn't wanted to be voyeur, then i remembered i'd been to Bosnia..). Anyhow he didn't show up to take us, got told that its now too dangerous for outsiders to enter, theyd of 'killed us' (not sure what the English translation is). The sheer cheek to go back the next day..Must dry behind ears.

Ended the weekend in style - on a drip in hospital. Rehab. We checked into plush hotel for 2 nights to complete the rehab. I'd of felt so cool if was back in college/thinking i was Pete Libertine again, alas I just lament having to endure some awful Adam Sandler film and paying twice my budget for a room with aircon and saline on tap. Help me get ma boots on.

Then onto Ilha Grande, a beautiful exotic island, camped in the rainforest, played cards in hammocks by candlelight etc. i was a general cock basically, or just your average Gap Year-er. Shamelessly overdid the ´holas' to the man on snake watch duty, im not as toughened up from the favella or the saline as i´d of liked.